One day at a time

“Know what you want to do, hold the thought firmly,

and do every day what should be done,

and every sunset will see you that much nearer the goal.”

Elbert Hubbard (1856-1915)

Two days in and I already feel the pressure I have placed myself under. NaNoWriMo is not for the faint of heart; however writing every chance I get,  I can see that the goal of 1700 words per day, is attainable. A bit of organization in my normal routine and it should be quite manageable. Lunch break at work is giving me the golden opportunity to get 1/2 hour of uninterrupted writing and once I start I feel an ease I had not suspected. I guess my heart was so full of the story I wanted to write, it is now letting loose on the blank page. All I have to do now is to keep my pen going straight on the paper.

However the challenge lies more in the fact I always tend to look ahead and when I do, this overwhelming feeling of anxiety strikes me down in the gut. “What did I get myself into this time?” I could berate myself questioning my poor judgement, however I also have another choice.

Today I accept the fact that I thrive under pressure even if I do not like it. I am a walking contradiction, wanting peace and quiet, a full-time job, mothering two teenagers while pursuing my artistic inclinations.  Did I mention I want to do all this at the same time? Given this impossible goal I choose instead  to go with the flow, try and do my best one day at a time, one page at a time.

The beauty in growing up lies in the acceptance of who we are. So I am trying to embrace my crazy self and be at peace with my contradictions knowing that deep inside I wouldn’t or couldn’t have it any other way.

Tell me friend am I the only one to feel like this???

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24 Comments

  1. Love “I am a walking contradiction”. I can relate to that. Best of luck on your writing journey sweet friend. :0)

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  2. I thought I had commented here already – but see that I haven’t.
    What some call stubborness, others will call tenacity or persistence. Sometimes we need to reframe how we are thinking about things – and particularly about ourselves.
    It sounds as if your discipline is already starting to pay off. I am looking forward to updates as you progress through this challenging month.

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  3. Oh how I admire the insight and the ability to be “gentle” with yourself. It does make all the difference when we realize we are meant to pour forth and disseminate the good from the bad at a later time. I hope the fountain continues to flow as you get your stories out Anyes- I admire the endeavor you boldly embrace every November!

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  4. It’s day three and I’m already behind. I started to write yesterday, but I kept getting interrupted. I’ll keep at it though. I’m stubborn like that. Luck!

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  5. My oldest learned a valuable lesson about this when he was in junior kindergarten. Ever his mother’s son, he either learned this from me or he received it genetically — so I learned the valuable lesson as well. He and I have the habit of looking at “the big picture”. We see what has to be done, by a deadline and we feel overwhelmed. And yes, we both work best under the pressure of a deadline — often leaving the bulk of something to the last minute, but we can pour it out and it’s everything we wanted it to be and sometimes more. What did we learn? That it is one step at a time. “We” learned it when they were making paper chains at Christmas time in school. All he could see was the amount of paper — 24 strips of paper to be made into one long chain and the project daunted him. His teacher (bless her soul) showed him that it’s just one strip of paper joined at a time and before you know it, the project is complete. I loved her for that and neither one of us has ever forgotten it — even when we feel overwhelmed by the big picture (as I did with breast cancer) — we remind each other — it’s one step at a time. Love that you are pouring the words onto the page!

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  6. I enjoyed this. A personal experience post on a nice page. Thank you for sharing. Your pages are loading just a little slow for me, though. I’m not sure if it’s on my end or yours but if you’ve had anybody else mention this, you know. Have a great day.

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  7. i think one key thing in writing to a dadline like this….is realizing you will edit later….just get it out on paper and realize its not your finished product, you may change things later….slow parts down or even rearrange scenes later….if you have a note on how the story progresses, keep a notebook nearby for that….you may use it or you may not….if you realize later you missed putting in a scene, spend a day banging that out, even though it may not fit where you are right now…have fun with it…smiles…

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    1. Brian, this is exactly the realization I came up with this year. The exercise is just writing…no editing, no rephrasing, just writing full steam ahead. The notebook follows me everywhere and it’s pouring outside, so apart from Sweet Son soccer game, I’ll be indoors.
      Writing, writing and more writing. Enjoy your week-end 🙂

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  8. You are not the only one who feels like this!

    As I have begun my writing, too, I have also felt the “pressure” you speak of that is all self induced. Yesterday I had to have a heart to heart talk with myself and regroup, go back to the basics and figure out just what I want to accomplish with this amazing exercise of writing daily. The pressure is much less now, and hopefully this will be more fun.

    “The beauty in growing up lies in the acceptance of who we are. So I am trying to embrace my crazy self and be at peace with my contradictions knowing that deep inside I wouldn’t or couldn’t have it any other way.” You identified it so well, that acceptance of who we are and being at peace with that. This may be the greatest lesson from all of this.

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